Being Honest

My friend commented  on Adjusting to Change:

“Oh my…this is huge! Not impossible, but huge! . . .”

Today

Right now this seems hugely impossible!!!!
I ate my way through thanksgiving as normal, smaller portions though…..now to start again
UGH! It seems like such a mountain and I’m not even sure I want to climb it.
Gird up my mind, thinking again why I started in the first place,

Was it just an  impluse?

Was it to please someone?

Do I really believe there is value in this change?

Is this what I need to face? instead of hoping things will change without me doing anything different?  Isn’t that the definition of insanity?

And then I hear:

O Daniel, a man greatly beloved, understand the words that I speak unto thee, and stand upright: for unto thee am I now sent. And when he had spoken this word unto me, I stood trembling.     Then said he unto me, Fear not, Daniel: for from the first day that thou didst set thine heart to understand, and to chasten thyself before thy God, thy words were heard, and I am come for thy words.    Then there came again and touched me one like the appearance of a man, and he strengthened me,     And said, O man greatly beloved, fear not: peace be unto thee, be strong, yea, be strong. And when he had spoken unto me, I was strengthened, and said, Let my lord speak; for thou hast strengthened me.   Daniel 10:11-12, 18-19

Why is this so very hard?

I went looking for a picture of climbing a mountain and stumbled across this essay I used as a e-mail post a long time ago.

I TRIED TO CLIMB THE MOUNTAIN TODAY.

I tried to climb the mountain today. As I inched my way up the path, I felt overwhelmed, so I had to turn back.

I tried to climb the mountain today. On my journey, darkness started to fall, and I was full of fear, so I had to return to a safe place.

I was ready to climb the mountain today. But it was so hot outside, I thought I better stay in my nice air-conditioned house and rest up for tomorrow’s attempt.

I was about to climb the mountain today. But I had so many other things to do, so instead of climbing the mountain I took care of much more important tasks. I washed my car, mowed the grass and watched the big game. Today the mountain will just have to wait.

I was going to climb the mountain today. But as I stared at the mountain in it’s majestic beauty, I knew I stood no chance of making it to the top, so I figured why even bother trying.

I have forgotten about climbing the mountain today; until a friend came by and asked me what I was up to lately. I told him I was thinking about climbing that mountain some day. I went on and on about how I was going to accomplish this task.

Finally, he said, “I just got back from climbing the mountain. For the longest time I told myself I was trying to climb the mountain but never made any progress. I almost let the dream of making it to the top die. I came up with every excuse of why I could not make it up the mountain, but never once did I give myself a reason why I could.

One day as I stared at the mountain and pondered, I realized that if I didn’t make an attempt at this dream all my dreams will eventually die.”

“The next morning, I started my climb.” He continued, “It was not easy, and at times I wanted to quit. But no matter what I faced, I placed one foot in front of the other, keeping a steady pace. When the wind tried to blow me over the edge, I kept walking. When the voices inside my head screamed “stop!” I focused on my goal never letting it out of sight, and I kept moving forward. At times, I was ready to quit, but I knew I had come too far. Time and time again, I reassured myself that I was going to finish this journey. I struggled to make it to the top, but I climbed the mountain!”

“I have to be going,” my friend said. “Tomorrow is a new day to accomplish more dreams. By the way, what are you going to do tomorrow?”

I looked at him, with intensity and confidence in my eyes, and said, “I have a mountain to climb.” – Gary Barnes

Then I found my picture with this ………..

The Mountain   Author: Jim Stovall

There were two warring tribes in the Andes, one that lived in the lowlands and the other high in the mountains. The mountain people invaded the lowlanders one day, and as part of their plundering of the people, they kidnapped a baby of one of the lowlander families and took the infant with them back up into the mountains.

The lowlanders didn’t know how to climb the mountain. They didn’t know any of the trails that the mountain people used, and they didn’t know where to find the mountain people or how to track them in the steep terrain.

Even so, they sent out their best party of fighting men to climb the mountain and bring the baby home.

The men tried first one method of climbing and then another. They tried one trail and then another. After several days of effort, however, they had climbed only several hundred feet.

Feeling hopeless and helpless, the lowlander men decided that the cause was lost, and they prepared to return to their village below.

As they were packing their gear for the descent, they saw the baby’s mother walking toward them. They realized that she was coming down the mountain that they hadn’t figured out how to climb.

And then they saw that she had the baby strapped to her back. How could that be?


One man greeted her and said, “We couldn’t climb this mountain. How did you do this when we, the strongest and most able men in the village, couldn’t do it?”
She shrugged her shoulders and said, “It wasn’t your baby.”

sighs……heartache……….tears……….

but I can’t say I’m starting the climb………………yet.

 

Published in: on December 3, 2011 at 12:12 pm  Comments (2)  

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2 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. I love this…it speaks volumes! How hard it is to start…to begin the climb, no matter what mountain lies before us! It can be so frustrating, especially when others around us take to the task so easily…at least it seems to be easy for them. I am praying for you. I know how hard this is!

  2. It’s been my experience anything worthwhile is worth the effort– even when it might take days or years to complete – you have down days of feeling not wanting to do it anymore this is a normal event – but I am hoping that if you do take a rest – rest for a short while and try again..each day is a new start ..to start again.. and again if needs be..just never throw in the towel!
    Hugs..


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